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REVIEW: Navy SEALS (1990) | ManlyMovie

REVIEW: Navy SEALS (1990)

Run Time: 113 Mins
Rated: R
What To Expect: Top Gun’s violent, foul mouthed cousin

For some reason I started thinking about this movie this week, because it had been so long since I’d watched it.  Then I Googled it and found that it was sitting at a 5.5 on the IMDb and a paltry 19% on RottenTomatoes.  Then I thought… no way!  How can they shit on this movie like that?  It was pretty good.  This lead me to actually check the reviews on RT and sure enough, there were pissants complaining about perceived ‘Arab bashing’, another whined that the movie was ‘macho’, while a third also bellyached that there were, quote, ‘hard men’, shooting things.  Seriously?  Complaining about machismo in a military movie?  What next, complaining about competitive spirit in a sports movie?!  Gentlemen, we have to go back, and defend this movie’s manly honor.

Consider the cast, Michael Biehn as the team leader.  Charlie Sheen as the trigger happy hot head, Denis Haysbert as the cool family man and Bill Paxton as the Barrett .50-wielding sniper.  This should already sell the movie.  They are the best of the best, and out to deal with some terrorists who have acquired MANPADs, which make them exceptionally dangerous.  But after a botched raid at the beginning of the movie where the missiles weren’t destroyed, team leader Biehn just can’t let it alone, and recruits the help of a specialist journalist (Joanne Whalley) in order to finish the job properly, taking down the dangerous terrorist that slipped his net.

The charge is that this was a military recruitment vehicle.  A Bush I era propaganda movie… and I’m like, so?  And?! Let’s remember that after Vietnam the U.S. Military was in serious disarray, with gangs having seized control from the officer class and preparedness in the toilet.  America’s love affair with this farcical army was over.  And it took ten years — most of the 1980s — to rebuild, purge the gang problem and to turn it into the lethal strike force you seen in Desert Storm, with movies like this being a celebration of this new-found confidence.  The SEALS were the best of the best and in this movie they’red pictured almost like rock stars with their own amazing Top Gun style theme tune (you’ll think, damn, that’s where I heard that theme!).  I fucking salute this!

But I would like to get some grievances out of the way first.  The above plot is, you know, kind of rickety, thin even by 1990’s action movie standards and it got to me now and again, that little was happening and that Biehn’s character was doing something that is really something not within his professional purview.  The ‘elite’ complexion of the team is also lost somewhat now and again, with Biehn’s character not always in control of his men at critical times, with sloppy weapons handling. Bill Paxton’s time in the movie is also also a double edged sword.  On the one hand, this is a cooler Paxton than you’ll probably remember.  Playing ‘God’, he’s not his typical loud mouthed self, but rather the cool and collected one of the bunch. I really like seeing this type Paxton but… he’s fucking criminally underused, barely in the movie… what we now might call one of those ‘extended cameos’.

Sheen features most heavily in the movie

Aside from that, the movie delivers.  The action is competently filmed, having pre-shaking camera bluster with a strong emphasis on practicality.  For example some of the blood effects are especially good, as in it almost looks like they picked up some meat from a nearby butcher to simulate splattered brain effects.  Romantic subplots also show their head but are ruthlessly cut short and interrupted by man business.  About to get married?  No!  Abandon her at the altar because your country has suddenly called on you to defend it!  Urgent, the message has come through, it’s time to kick ass!

And also, Charlie Sheen is at his best here, with arrogant, chauvinistic winning occurring here, there and everywhere, including cutting off yet more romantic sap at the knees to rescue his beloved automobile!  Above all, man business gets handled first and foremost.  And all the while, Sylvester Levay is pumping a soundtrack to rival Jerr Goldsmith’s action scores through the speakers.

So this may not have been up there with the Sylvester Stallone or Arnold Schwarzenegger movies of the day but damn, it has aged well and it’s sort of Top Gun’s more violent, foul mouthed alpha cousin. Watch it again this weekend!

19 Comments

  1. Avatar

    The Fanboy Perspective

    April 22, 2017 at 11:13 am

    I remember loving this movie when I was younger, haven’t seen it in ages though, but the cast alone is undeniably amazing. Michael Biehn in a military movie? Count me in! https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/97aaacca25146d2827b1c6791e57e242ce3cae584c3026a231b1fdd5ff529680.gif

  2. Avatar

    Mucho Macho

    April 22, 2017 at 12:28 pm

    What a coincidence!
    I was thinking about writing something about some Charlie Sheen movies for a little while now but I’ve been very busy as of late.
    But I’m going to get to it soon now for sure. Anyone is welcomed to remind me if I don’t get to it

    • Avatar

      ColonelBobi

      April 22, 2017 at 4:23 pm

      Navy Seals was OK but could’ve been a lot better. If you are going to do a Sheen movie you should make it The Rookie where he is outshined by our manly deity Clint. Or go back and do Platoon?

      • The Night Rider

        The Night Rider

        April 22, 2017 at 5:09 pm

        I think The Rookie is Sheen’s finest hour. The scene where he returned to the bar and burned it to the ground is unfathomably manly!

        • Avatar

          David Barber

          April 23, 2017 at 11:25 pm

          I agree. “C’mon, mother******s!”

        • Avatar

          ColonelBobi

          April 24, 2017 at 8:46 pm

          Haha yes that and near the end where the movie has come full circle and it’s Sheen reluctantly breaking in a new partner same as with him and Clint at the beginning. Badass movie

      • Avatar

        Mucho Macho

        April 24, 2017 at 10:58 am

        I actually loved “Navy Seals” & think the movie is awesome.
        But…”The Rookie” is fuckin great!!
        2 manly classics in my book

        • Avatar

          ColonelBobi

          April 24, 2017 at 8:44 pm

          Eh it’s one i’d watch if I found it flicking through channels but I wouldn’t plan a night around it. I do like the scene where Sheen humiliates the guy in a bar then kisses him. Crazy fucker!

          • Avatar

            Mucho Macho

            April 24, 2017 at 8:54 pm

            Some say too fuckin crazy!
            Lol

          • Avatar

            ColonelBobi

            April 25, 2017 at 2:48 pm

            Nah Crazy Charlie will always be a manly legend in my book. I grew up on his antics. He behaved exactly like I like to think I would’ve done with an insane amount of money at a young age.

          • Avatar

            Mucho Macho

            April 25, 2017 at 3:28 pm

            Up until the late 90s, Sheen did some awesome movies

  3. Avatar

    Mucho Macho

    April 22, 2017 at 12:41 pm

    I love this movie of course & this picture would not get made today like this.
    It’s too heterosexual & manly.

    • Avatar

      booger

      April 22, 2017 at 6:02 pm

      Only problem is no one can actually believe these guys are navy seals, they have little muscles.

  4. Avatar

    Mucho Macho

    April 22, 2017 at 12:50 pm

    Hey..
    Check those privileges boys
    https://youtu.be/TlCW90DaJHY

  5. Avatar

    ChrisWhite

    April 22, 2017 at 6:02 pm

    Way too high but what DO you expect from a guy who have made a history to give old mediocre movies another extralife…

  6. Avatar

    cescoss

    April 22, 2017 at 8:29 pm

    I love this movie. I hope for an bluray with italian inside…

  7. Avatar

    David Barber

    April 23, 2017 at 11:27 pm

    I recorded this off TV in December 1994 during the school holidays and remember enjoying it. It was an ITV Diet Coke Movie Premiere and I’ll never forget Charlie Sheen shooting a guy in the head because he said something about his mother.

  8. Avatar

    Lone Wolf

    May 2, 2017 at 12:19 am

    Should be a 10!!!! It’s a fucking classic